without notice, i let the sad girl slip through my fingers. it wasn't very easy trying to let her go, but then again, i don't think i ever did. it's hard to let go of something that actually has meaning to you. i mean it's hard that you're sobbing and struggling to breathe every single fucking night and you wonder if she ever thinks about you. and you wonder if you even deserve to be the epitome of her thoughts, and although you are, as many signs tell you, you can't believe that. it's hard that you can feel physical pain, an ache in your chest with every breathe you take, and there's a weight on your shoulders, and a dreary cloud over your head. it's hard that people can tell that there's something killing you inside, something that's been breaking down your soul for a long time. that's how it was for me, when i let her leave. my life was completely dull and i found myself seeking out a familiar face; a face that looked just like hers. each time i found someone, i found myself pointing out their flaws. that girl's ears are bigger than hers. that girl smiles too prettily, unnaturally, when hers is just easy and contagious. that girl who pretends to be just like her, because she thinks sadness is a trend and will find her love. i found myself obliterating the girl within my mind, but somehow the sad girl's voice swamps my mind and tell her to leave the child be. she knows not of what she does. i think she made me love her deceased soul even more. ---- REMEMBER ME; PART IV.